Key takeaways
- More than 90% of a child’s brain development occurs in the first five years of life, meaning the social experiences children have during this window shape far more than just how they make friends
- Social skills are a collection of capabilities, from communication and empathy to conflict resolution, that children build gradually through play, relationships, and everyday routines
- High-quality early childhood education is associated with greater social competence, stronger language development, and better emotional regulation
- Children don’t need to arrive anywhere perfect; they need consistent opportunities to practise, make mistakes, and try again in an environment where they feel safe and supported
Social skills are just as important as academic readiness in the early years
Ask most parents what prepares a child for the future, and you’ll often hear about learning letters, numbers, and getting ready for school. Yet some of the most important lessons happen during play, friendships, and everyday interactions with others. It’s through these experiences that children begin developing the social skills that shape how they learn, communicate, and build relationships.
It’s something many parents have seen countless times. During those first days at childcare or school, a child might introduce themselves to someone new, gather the courage to join a game, or choose to observe from the sidelines for a little while longer. It may seem like a small interaction, but these everyday experiences are where children begin learning how to connect with others, navigate social situations, and find their place within a group.
What does social development look like in early childhood?
Developing strong social skills in early childhood sits at the heart of your child’s mental and emotional development. Rather than a single ability, they’re a collection of capabilities that children learn gradually, and at their own pace:
- Communication skills like expressing needs clearly, asking for help, and listening when someone else is speaking
- Building positive relationships by sharing, taking turns, and cooperating with others, even when it’s hard
- Empathy, which in the early years looks like beginning to notice and respond to how other people feel
- Conflict resolution, including managing disagreements in age-appropriate ways rather than just reacting
- Reading social cues such as facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language, which are all part of how children understand the world around them
It’s worth noting that children develop all of these at different rates, and that’s completely normal. What matters is that they have plenty of opportunity to practise.
Why the early years are such an important window to develop social skills
More than 90% of a child’s brain development occurs within the first five years of life. This means the social experiences they have during this period aren’t simply formative in a general sense; they’re helping shape the neural foundations that future learning, behaviour, and relationships are built upon. What children learn about relating to others during these early years, including how to manage conflict, ask for help, communicate effectively, and feel comfortable in a group, often becomes the framework they draw on when navigating future relationships and new situations throughout life.
The 2024 Australian Early Development Census found that nearly one in four Australian children were developmentally vulnerable in at least one domain when starting school, with social competence and emotional maturity among the areas of greatest concern.
Children who begin kindy or school without these social foundations often find the transition more challenging. It’s not because they lack ability or potential, but because the skills needed to navigate group settings, build relationships, and manage emotions are still developing at a time when they’re expected to draw on them more independently.
The early years offer an important opportunity to build these important skills. Children who have regular, positive social experiences during this time often settle more comfortably into group learning environments and feel more confident engaging with the people and world around them.
How social skills connect to other areas of development in early childhood
Social development is closely connected to many other areas of a child’s growth, influencing how they learn, communicate, and interact with the world around them.
- Language development: Conversations, group activities, and play with others are among the biggest drivers of vocabulary growth and stronger communication skills
- Emotional regulation: Social situations give children repeated opportunities to practise managing big feelings like frustration, excitement, and disappointment in real time
- Cognitive development: Sharing, negotiating, and problem-solving with peers builds critical thinking and encourages children to consider perspectives beyond their own
- School readiness: Children with stronger social foundations tend to transition more comfortably into formal learning environments, finding it easier to follow routines, form friendships, and engage with teachers and classmates
How children naturally develop social skills
Children don’t learn social skills through formal lessons alone. Most of their social and emotional development happens naturally through everyday experiences, relationships, and interactions.
Through play
Play is one of the most powerful tools for social learning. Whether they’re building a cubby together, taking turns in a game, or engaging in imaginative play, children are constantly learning how to communicate, cooperate, negotiate, and work through disagreements.
Through relationships with trusted adults
Children learn by observing the people around them. When parents, educators, and caregivers communicate calmly, show empathy, and treat others with respect, children begin to model those behaviours in their own interactions.
Through everyday routines
Simple activities such as sharing a meal, helping pack away toys, or accompanying a parent to the shops provide countless opportunities to practise conversation, patience, cooperation, and understanding social expectations.
Through gentle guidance
Challenges and conflicts are a normal part of childhood. When a supportive adult helps children navigate these moments rather than immediately solving them, children gradually develop the skills and confidence to manage social situations independently.
The role of early learning environments in social and emotional development
One thing that’s difficult to replicate at home is the daily practice of being part of a group. Childcare settings give children regular contact with different personalities, needs, and perspectives, which is exactly the kind of varied experience that builds social capability over time. Australian research shows that attendance at high-quality early childhood education is associated with greater social competence, more advanced expressive vocabulary, and less impulsivity.
Skilled educators create intentional opportunities for this learning, whether through circle time, collaborative play, or simply how they respond when two children are in disagreement over the same puzzle. At SunRise Kids, relationships sit at the centre of how we think about early learning. Children get to know their educators and their peers well, which builds the kind of trust and security that lets social development flourish. That sense of belonging, of feeling known and safe in a group, is what allows children to take the small social risks that learning requires.
This approach aligns closely with the Early Years Learning Framework, particularly Outcome 2: Children are connected with and contribute to their world, which focuses on helping children build positive relationships, develop a sense of belonging, and learn how to engage respectfully with others and their communities.
Simple ways to support social skills at home
Supporting your child’s social development at home is mostly about making the most of the moments you’re already having together:
- Make time for unstructured play with other children, whether at the park, a family gathering, or a casual playdate, so children have room to practise the skills they’re building in a low-pressure setting
- Talk through social moments as they happen rather than after the fact. A simple “How do you think your friend felt when that happened?” builds perspective over time without needing a lecture
- Let children practise small negotiations and offer choices rather than always saying no, which gives them a sense of agency and teaches them that disagreement can be worked through calmly
- Resist the urge to step in the moment things get tricky between children. Staying nearby while letting them try to work it out first is often where the real learning happens
- Read books together that explore friendship, feelings, and fairness, and chat about the stories, since children often find it easier to talk about big emotions through a character than about themselves directly
When to keep an eye out
Some children find social situations more challenging, and that’s completely okay. If you notice consistent difficulty connecting with peers, significant distress in social settings, or communication challenges that seem to be getting in the way, it’s worth a gentle conversation with your child’s educators or your GP. Early support can make a real difference, and at SunRise Kids, our educators observe children closely and are always happy to chat with families about what they’re seeing.
Social skills, like all skills, develop over time and with the right kind of support around them. Children don’t need to arrive anywhere perfect. They need to feel safe, seen, and part of a community where it’s okay to get things wrong and try again. If you’d like to see how we approach this at SunRise Kids, we’d love to have you in for a tour.